I’ve been reading and watching comments about the
portrayal of women in media. They’re
considered too weak, too focused on relationships and their own feelings. Society thinks that women need to be strong,
to be able to fight and excel in whatever field they put their mind to.
I have no objections to that. I think that it’s a good thing that women are
given that opportunity. It could be considered a compliment that we can do
anything we want. But what happens when
a woman’s desires aren’t focused on a career or a political cause?
My character was focused on her family, and wanting to keep
them safe. Sure, there’s an element of romance, but in the end, all she wants
is to be there for the children, make sure that they grow up correctly, and
that they always feel loved. I began to
wonder if it was an appropriate goal, or if I would alienate readers because
her fight and focus is only on family.
I presented my question in a forum, and received an answer
that made me smile.
The responder mentioned Molly Weasley. I think she is really one of the unsung women
heroes. I hadn’t even stopped to give
her a second thought. But she’s always
been there, taking care of her many children, struggling to provide all their
school supplies, sending them howlers when they disobey, taking in their
friends when they were alone … and of course, there will always be the moment
that she killed Bellatrix to protect her family. An act that I don't think anyone would doubt her character would do.
And as I considered the powerhouse that is Molly Weasley, I
realized how many other women I’ve met who are really the unsung heroes in
society. We can all find articles about
women who are CEO’s, doctors, lawyers, but how many articles focus on the women
who put family first? The women who
could be earning a large amount of money, but instead decide to spend their
time with their children, stretching their budgets, and sacrificing their own
needs and desires so that their children can take dance lessons, or have enough
equipment to play soccer.
My own mother was an example of a woman who was willing to
sacrifice so much for us. I wish that
there were moments that we’d stopped to thank her, but many times, her
sacrifices weren’t as obvious as they could have been.
I think we need more women in literature like Molly Weasley
and my mother. We need strong women who are
willing to take a stand and create a better future for their family.
Can any of you think of such women in literature?
In Total Agreement With You! Such A Nice Post! Thanks For This! Special Thanks! For Me My Mom Is Just As Great As God! So Particularly I'm Impressed And Speechless After Reading This! Thanks A Ton!
ReplyDeleteThank you! I'm glad to see that you feel the same way. I know that I wish I could see more women like my mom, your mom and Molly Weasley in books.
DeleteInteresting post. I think it would be nice to see more Molly Weasleys in literature.
ReplyDeleteI would love your opinion on the main character in the story I'm working on in my blog. I'm trying to write a realistic female lead set in a different culture/time period, and of the many factors, her home life is a major part of the story. Like you said, I'm getting to the point where I wonder if it's an acceptable balance. The story is called "Second Daughter", at http://lesbeauxreves.wordpress.com
ReplyDeleteLovely post. I love your "read" of Molly Weasley. I shared the "I hate Strong Female Characters" post with you on Google+ so you know what I'm thinking--I agree. The "ordinary" women seem to be getting forgotten and unheralded, as if protecting your children and taking care of them, or being a quiet, shy person is somehow not the stuff worthy of hearing about.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for sharing that link! I feel like it was almost in response to what I'd written here, and to what I'd been struggling with for so long. I miss the female characters who act like actual females, who don't know martial arts or who are willing to protect their families and children. Thank you so much!
DeleteI grew up a conservative Christian, with the counter-cultural mindset that women are *supposed* to stay at home and raise kids! Now, we're not legalistic about it--if you choose to go to work, that's up to you. But for my family, the norm is to raise kids.
ReplyDeleteMy literary example would be Anne of Green Gables. In the later books, she makes a nice living as a writer, but first she raises her kids.
My real life examples would be my mother and older sister. My mother got her degree in business. She's a smart woman who designed many features of our home herself. She also devoted her life to raising and home-schooling ten kids. She taught us to cook from scratch, she taught us to clean, and she taught us to balance fun and work.
My older sister has her Master's in Piano Pedagogy. She teaches piano from her home a couple days a week. The rest of the time, she raises her two children, and cooks and cleans for her husband.
According to society, neither of these women can possibly be fulfilled in what they're doing. But I defy you to find a happier pair in the world. It's hard work! It is HARD to chase two year olds and cook dinner and save a little energy for your husband at the end of the day! But they love it.
That's my rant for the day; sorry :P
I grew up in a very similar background, and I understand exactly what you mean. And I love Anne! What a great example of a strong woman.
DeleteAnd I agree with your statement. When a woman finds her place, whether it be in the business world, or at home, as long as she is working at what she loves and what she believes in, then she is strong. My mother is the same way, except she never finished her degree because her pregnancy with me was so difficult. I still see her struggling to feel like she's as accomplished as other women, even though she's raised 5 kids (very well, if I say so myself). I just wish there was a way to help women in her place understand that the world's standards aren't always the correct ones.